Couples Counseling

Couples Counseling

What brings couples into counseling?

I often hear from couples that are in despair-frightened that their relationship is beyond help. Their communication has broken down, trust has eroded and sex is almost nonexistent. I also frequently see fundamentally strong couples that may be facing a specific crisis and want the aid of a professional.

Partners come into couples counseling or marriage counseling with a variety of issues to address including communication & conflict resolution, sexual & intimacy issues, fighting and anger problems, identity and role conflict, dependence vs. independence, religion, ethics and values, jealousy, parenting, infidelity, money and finances, addiction, family and in-law struggles, step-family issues, gender roles, infertility/ adoption, and many more.

How We Approach Couples Counseling.

With compassion, understanding and non-judgement I approach couples counseling utilizing the latest in research as to what is effective. What do I expect of you as my client? I expect a serious commitment to our work, an ability to be open when looking at what you bring into the relationship (both positive and negative) without defensiveness, and a commitment to altering your own ineffectual behaviors. When these conditions are met there is an excellent chance that I can not only help you  get your relationship  back on track, but take you to an even stronger place… one that you may not have imagined was possible, but was achievable through our couples counseling sessions.

What is the process of couples therapy?

The couples therapy process starts with (3) Assessment Sessions, followed by Intervention Sessions (8-20, on average). The process is:

One conjoint assessment session of 45 minutes.

One individual session per partner, 45 minutes each.

One conjoint assessment/feedback session of 45 minutes. During your feedback session, we set goals to help your relationship to thrive.

Intervention conjoint sessions of 45 minutes. The intervention sessions are designed to meet your goals for your relationship. During these sessions we focus on helping you rebuild your relationship outside of sessions, with the goal of helping you significantly improve your relationship in the shortest duration possible.

How will my relationship improve?

If your relationship is in distress, you and your partner may be creating habitual patterns that become self-reinforcing and take on a life of their own. A cycle is created that may affect all aspects of your lives together, defining the way you experience each other.

Effective counseling addresses many aspects of the relationship and communication tends to be a primary focus of couples counseling. When partners repeatedly employ conflict avoidance or engage in heated power struggles, communication problems ensue; resentment builds, and repairs are never made. Studies show that the lack of adequate repair following an argument is the biggest contributor to relationship unhappiness and breakups.

Working together as a team, I will guide you to:

• Communicate and manage conflict more effectively.
• Engage in constructive, rather than destructive conflicts.
• Develop skills to help regulate your emotions so you can stay calm when resolving conflict.
• Improve the quality of sex, romance, and passion. Identify what matters most to each other. Support each others hopes and aspirations and build a sense of purpose in each others lives together.
• Reduce the risk of relapsing into the same old patterns.

For an Appointment